Real Love

 

[The following is a manuscript of my message delivered at Pilgrim Reformed Church on Sunday morning, the 6th of September, 2026.  We have air conditioning again, so if all went well, a recording of the service may be available on our YouTube streaming channel: 

https://www.youtube.com/@pilgrimreformedchurch1992/streams for the older services or https://www.youtube.com/@pilgrimreformedchurch3115/streams for later services.]

Over and over in our bible, we are told to love one another, and how important love is.  Jesus says to love God is the greatest commandment, and to love others is the second most important.  But how do we love?  What does truly loving others entail?  Must we also love the unlovable?

I want to pick up where we left off last week while working through the Apostle Paul's Letter to the Romans.  He had just finished encouraging us to make of ourselves a living sacrifice in service to God and Jesus - to give of ourselves, our time, our resources - since Jesus sacrificed His own mortal life for us.  Today, he continues with ways we can show our love.

Please listen and follow along as Paul answers those questions about truly loving others, as I read verses 9 through 21 of the 12th chapter of the Apostle’s Letter to the Romans, and I’ll be reading from the New Living Translation of our Holy Bible this morning…

9 Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. 10 Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. 11 Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. 12 Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. 13 When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality.

14 Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. 15 Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!

17 Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. 18 Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.

19 Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say,

“I will take revenge;

I will pay them back,”

says the Lord.

20 Instead,

“If your enemies are hungry, feed them.

If they are thirsty, give them something to drink.

In doing this, you will heap

burning coals of shame on their heads.”

21 Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.

--Romans 12:9-21 (NLT)

Let us pray…  Father God, You know that way too often we have trouble loving all others.  Even within our own circles of friends and acquaintances, there are some we simply cannot force ourselves to truly love as Paul says we should.  Thank You, Father, for inspiring the Apostle to give us clarity on how we should love, and to love all people, not just those we find loveable.  So Father, please open our hearts to receive Your message this morning.  Touch each of us with Your most Holy Spirit that we might be moved to love others as You love us.  In the precious name of Christ Jesus we pray.  Amen.

Each Sunday I like to include a little illustration to sort of set the stage for the message.  Today's illustration is short, but powerful.

Today in the Word magazine once noted where British Protestant minister and preacher John Henry Jowett proclaimed that, “Ministry that costs nothing, accomplishes nothing.”

“Ministry that costs nothing, accomplishes nothing.”  Sadly, folks that receive something of value for free, something they didn’t earn or work for, they don’t treat it very well and it doesn’t hold up or last.  If it costs nothing, it is often seen as worthless.  Jowett is saying the same holds true for ministries.

Think for a moment about some of our ministries here at Pilgrim, with the most obvious being our services every Sunday morning.  If I stood up here and just looked at you, and the choir and Mary Ann sat there silently, and we all spent an hour here just looking at each other, our gathering would accomplish nothing.  If we don’t make the effort to help out in the greater community, and maybe bring a few lost souls to Christ, would we really have accomplished anything as the church, the body of Christ left on earth to carry on His work?  We've got to be willing to work at our service for Jesus, to give of ourselves helping others, in order to truly accomplish something worthwhile.

In verse 11 of our scripture reading, where Paul says, “work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically”, one version puts it, “let the Spirit excite you as you serve the Lord”.  Now, working hard is a relative term.  Some of us are no longer capable of hard labor, but that doesn’t mean we can’t strive diligently to serve our Lord by showing our love to others.

Not only that, but we can also be enthusiastic in our service, can’t we?  We can let God’s Holy Spirit living within us excite us into even greater enthusiasm, and greater joy, in our service.  We can “work hard” at whatever level of service we can provide, even if it’s just being nice to people.

Paul goes on to give us some good advice when he says we should be patient in times of trouble, and to keep praying.  We know those times will come.  Jesus Himself warned us they would.  But they will also pass, so we just need to be patient and let things play out in God’s great plan.  And in good times and bad, we should be ready to help God’s people when they are in need.

Who are “God’s people”?  All of us, all of mankind.  God created us all in His image, so we are all His.  Rather than cursing those who harm us or make us mad, we should pray for them and bless them.  Treat an enemy with love and kindness and turn them into a friend.  And we shouldn’t seek revenge for any mistreatment.  That’s above our pay grade, for God says “Vengeance is Mine”, not ours to exact.  Oh, and we must not be too proud of ourselves, thinking ourselves better than others, smarter than others.  All of this is how we can show true love to others, how we can really love them and not just pretend to.

Loving all others is tough.  I mean let’s face it…  how many of us could truly love the likes of Adolph Hitler, or your regular garden-variety terrorist?  Too often we let hatred rule us rather than love.  Please listen as wise King Solomon fills us in on the results of our usual treatment of others, in verses 18, 20, and 23 of the 25th chapter of his Book of Proverbs…

18 Telling lies about others

is as harmful as hitting them with an ax,

wounding them with a sword,

or shooting them with a sharp arrow.

20 Singing cheerful songs to a person with a heavy heart

is like taking someone’s coat in cold weather

or pouring vinegar in a wound.

23 As surely as a north wind brings rain,

so a gossiping tongue causes anger!

--Proverbs 25:18,20,23 (NLT)

Add to this list what Jesus said, when He told us that hating someone is the same as murdering them.  This shows a vindictive nature, not a loving one.  We may smile and be nice to their face, but if we’re holding onto anger toward them in our hearts, we are not loving as God and Jesus command us to love.

In our scripture reading, Paul directly quotes two passages from what we now call the Old Testament.  The first is from the Book of Deuteronomy when Moses speaks for God saying, “I will take revenge, I will pay them back”.  This is what I referred to as, “Vengeance is Mine”, as some bible versions put it.  God will take care of distributing rewards and punishments, as He sees fit.  He doesn’t need our help.

Paul also quotes what King Solomon says in verses 21 and 22 of the 25 chapter of his Book of Proverbs, in between the verses of what I read a moment ago, as the king tells us how we should act towards those we see as our enemies…

21 If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat.

If they are thirsty, give them water to drink.

22 You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads,

and the Lord will reward you.

--Proverbs 25:21-22 (NLT)

Now, our goal in treating our enemies with kindness should not be to cause them shame, but to show them love as part of God’s creation and as God commands us.  So yes, we should show real love and mercy even to our enemies.  And the Lord will reward us for our acts of kindness.

To really love all others, we must always strive to live in harmony with each other.  This means our relatives and friends, our fellow worshipers, our brothers and sisters in Christ, the non-believers in our community and across the globe, and even those who hate us.

We must do all we can to live in peace with everyone.  Even in our overly-contentious world, we can make it a purpose to not engage others in hostility, even when they are acting in a hostile manner toward us.  This is what Jesus meant in His Sermon on the Mount when He said, “Do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also.”

Let us be purposeful in loving others – all others.  And let us truly love them, not just pretend to.  Let us love them as Jesus loved us.  In the blessed name of Christ Jesus our Lord, who showed us what love is all about.  Amen.

Let us pray…  Almighty God, thank You for giving us so many instructions in our bible about loving others, and especially how to love them.  By Your gracious love of us and the sacrifice Jesus made on our behalf, we are granted eternal life with You in heaven.  Please help us share that wonderful gift with others, showing them the way to Jesus, so they too might be saved.  Help us show them our love.

Please hear us now, Father, as we pause for just a moment so that each of us can speak to You through Your Spirit within us, promising to be more obedient to Your and our Lord’s commands, and seeking Your help to do so…

Lord Jesus, thank You for showing us how to love.  Thank You for giving Paul so much insight into Yourself and Your teachings that he was able to share it will all the known world, and even us today.  Please help us love in the same way that You love: selflessly, unconditionally, sacrificially.  Help us show that love by sharing the glorious Gospel message with others.  Help us seek the lost and lead them to You.

Holy Spirit, please shield our minds and our hearts from Satan’s lies and the world’s empty promises.  Guide us around all the devil’s traps and snares.  Help us see though his temptations.  Help us keep our focus on the things of heaven and the needs of others rather than on anything this world might offer.  All this we pray in the blessed name of Christ Jesus our Lord.  Amen.